Journal 18 - Sangiovese and Nietzsche

My heart still beats to the sound of its own
drum; literally it manically pounds inside my
chest – quite visible to any eye. It was a mistake
to take the Sangiovese. The cowslips and the
purple bowers are diminished with their lost voice –
Romanticism is such naïveté. Why mark a word up
so – the Romans weren't so cruel. Why must I
have a large appetite and a weak heart? It shouldn't
fail me but it could. It is troubled like a foster
orphaned girl exasperated with the cat-calls of her next-
door friends. Friends is such a tossed about word;
like love. If English could be Greek. Phi and Theta share
so much and are so different. Nothing to see here, pass
along. I glance at the bikinis bathing in the sun at
the Food & Wine Festival – there should be a law about
who can and can't wear bikinis. And those who can –
must! Sidewalks are ambiguous in their unclaimed owner-
ship. I mow the grass on the other side though. Smells
good however abused in poems and others. Bent grass
tells lots of stories and betrays many stow-aways. An
eyelash looks a bit like some expensive bent grass –
the kind people sit in bars and listen to experts,
inaudible experts, pontificate about. Philosophers
are no longer real – having taken up comedy or
cheese. Wittgenstein did close the book on philo-
sophy; so many still don't want to believe. They're
good historians of 19th century problems and 20th
century solutions. Correspondence is not coherent;
yet coherence is abstract. Math is tautological yet
dictates truth. I know, math is more than mere
tautology – at least so say the mathematicians.
Empiricism and Rationalism are either circular or
self-contradictory. Leaving us with nothing. Nietzsche
took a baseball bat to the head and laughed his
big German laugh. Was Berkeley crazy? (Yes!)
But there is no real answer outside of God – and
yes, which God matters. God is like the unknown
uncle who has been following your life paying for every-
thing and remaining in the dark – receiving no credit
when the police reluctantly release you from prison.